So, a Mr.Little - no relation - wakes up in the hospital.
"What on earth happened? Why am I here?!" he asks the doctor
"You've been in a terrible car accident. You're going to live but I'm afraid there is some bad news. You lost your penis in the crash. However, the good news is that there is corrective surgery that can reconstruct it. While you were unconscious, your insurance company contacted us and said they will pay £8,000 for the surgery. But as you're aware, the NHS is in dire straits, so we'll have to charge, I'm afraid... The cost will be £1,000 per inch. You may want to spend the entire amount or maybe only four or five thousand - It's up to you, but your wife is waiting to visit you. Perhaps this is something you should discuss together before you decide? I'll check in with you the next time I do my rounds."
A few hours later, the doctor returns...
"Did you manage a chat with your wife?"
"I did," the man tells him.
"And what is your decision?" the doctor asks.
Mr.Little shrugs.
"We're going for the granite worktops...."