Joke Thread 4

[stuart little]

?

Nah, I just ignore the ones unsure:to me) that are meaningless, ie "Me no comprende"?

 

[MikeJhn]

 

[stuart little]

View attachment 177319

That sure ain't no joke!

 

[Doug B]

 

[flying haggis]

 

[Stan]

Lol. That skip picture reminds me of when I was a student. There was a pizza place that allowed one free trip to the salad bar with your bowl. With sticks of celery as radial supports and lettuce leaves to fill in the gaps, I could easily quadruple what I could carry away from the bar in one go. Should have studied civ.eng.

My joke for today:

Q. What is the most dangerous part of a car?

A. The nut that holds on the steering wheel.

 

[Cordy]

Entered my painting of Orion's Belt into an art competition..

I didn't win, but I did get a constellation prize.

 

[Blackswanwood]

 

[mc281]

After 100 pages time for some fresh humour.

Please keep in mind:

Please ensure contributions do not contain risqué innuendo or images that might offend, remember and be aware that not everyone has the same sense of humour and a joke you may find funny, may cause insult or offence to others.
Our members are from a varied demographic, age and gender, please keep that in mind.

 

[Doug B]

 

[Dr Al]

View attachment 177376

Took me a second - American mispronunciation humour (or should that be humor)

 

[Doug B]

 

[bushwhaker]

 

[stuart little]

View attachment 177376

Only works if you are 'across the pond', & can't pronounce European names!

 

[Amateur]

 

[kinverkid]

 

[John Brown]

Took me a second - American mispronunciation humour (or should that be humor)

To be fair, we generally don't pronounce it the way the Dutch do. Most Brits say it to rhyme with "cough". The Dutch sound more like they're suffering from one.

 

[Blackswanwood]

 

[Cordy]

An old fella was celebrating 92 years on this earth.

He spoke to his toes:

"Hello, toes." He said. "How are you? You know, you are 92 today. Oh, the times we've had! Remember how we walked in the park in the summer every Sunday afternoon? The times we waltzed on the dance floor? Happy Birthday, toes!"

"Hello, knees!" He continued. "How are you? You know you're 92 today... Oh, the times we've had! Remember when we marched in the parade? Oh, the hurdles we've jumped together. Happy Birthday, knees!"

Then, he looked down at his crotch. "Hello, Willie! You little pipper. Just think, If you were alive today, you'd be 92."

 

[Andy's Shed]