I'm worried about what people will think after I die...


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It all comes down to whether nature has a purpose or an objective, or is it just a pointless merry go round of continous birth offset by death.

The question to ask is why is there a form of inteligent life on our planet and nothing on other planets within light years away, it does seem odd why we are just an isolated group of living beings in this part of the universe. Given we do not know just how big the universe is then you have to accept that there has to be other life out there and maybe other isolated groups but again why, surely everything has a purpose and we cannot just be an accident. Then given the complexity of a human life form are we really saying that just given enough time evolution can produce us from maybe a single celled amoeba! There are really to many coincidences and there has to be something else involved that can glue all the pieces together and make sense and reason to life itself, maybe we began somewhere many light years away on some other planet but got exiled to this corner of the universe like a prison colony of the unwanted, maybe we were the rejects or some experiment that is still being watched to see how things evolve.
What if atomic physics is wrong and the nucleus of an atom isn't the smallest thing in the universe? What if every nucleus of every atom in our universe is in fact its own universe containing billions of galaxies? And conversely, our universe is just the nucleus of an atom in a larger universe? And onwards and onwards, smaller and larger, ad infinitum?

What if those specks of dust floating about in the sunlight in my workshop window
are all universes? And what if.............

Well, depending on your point of view, all will be revealed when you die. Or it won't. So why worry about what people might think when you shuffle off? 🙃
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What if atomic physics is wrong and the nucleus of an atom isn't the smallest thing in the universe?
That is why these scientist have theories, they are possible but not proven.

Perhaps we are the smallest thing in the universe, so small that we don't see reality and time for us is always extreme slow motion. So in the big world we could be so small that we all fit in the equivalent space of a square mm ! We could all be living in someones home but we are so small to see anything and time and distance are so different that it is like two different worlds.
As a child, on long journeys with my parents, I convinced myself we were actually driving in circles with an all powerful being changing the scenery. Complete nonsense of course - or it may be true.

These days I prefer pragmatism and rational thought to speculation on the improbable and unproveable. The universe may simply be a kind of fractal Mobius strip - but does it matter?

There are an infinite number of "what ifs" - are chisels sentient beings, dovetail joints a legacy of a Martian invasion, can talking to trees make the trunks grow straighter, is Titebond actually lots of very little people holding on tight - none of these thoughts now trouble me.
..OK, the title is actually a scenario - it's not my scenario. I'm worried about quality of life and doing meaningful things while I'm alive.

I have a relative who has spent his life generating money and investing it into an absolutely bonkers absurd amount while he lives on the state pension level of income. He spent decades in some odd mode of worrying about becoming poor somehow (50 of him could live on his means and be comfortable - maybe more). He was raised that way, but for some reason, making the pile bigger increases his satisfaction. He wanted to give the money to his kids, but they're already set for life, too (thanks to imitating dad) - and they haven't met his criteria for being absurdly enriched - having children and creating generational wealth and comfort that he sought.

So in the last two or three years, he's suddenly realized that his money will outlive him by a large amount and he's horribly concerned about what will happen with the money, and whether or not he'll think the spending of it is approvable by him (as in, he would like to see people have chances to take the profession that he took in - a branch of applied mathematics as well as automation and computing applied to it - that would be OK. Lots of other things wouldn't).

I've never known him to worry about anything but accumulation, so this is a funny thing and I always torture him with "if I were you, I would worry about what I wanted out of the rest of my life, which could be short at your age, and I guarantee if you do some basic legwork and line up where your money is going (none is going to me, that's for sure!!), I guarantee if you don't let it bother you while you're alive, it won't bother you while you're dead". He laughs nervously - as if he can't make the rational step to knowing that he won't notice anything at dirt temperature.


Enter scenario 2 - my MIL has a plot in a cemetery. It was purchased probably 40 years ago with her husband. They switched churches and now she doesn't love the overlook that the cemetery sees. She's very worried that people will think she's an silly person for having such a plot after she dies. My wife is into this kind of thing, too - worried about being embarrassed (I am a constant source of embarrassment for her, whether I'm disagreeing with her in public or not wearing the right clothes for the occasion, etc). I ask my MIL - what does your plot matter? It's a nice church. There's a highway in view a mile away where it used to be rolling hills, but you won't be able to see it. Within a few years, the people walking through the cemetery will have no clue who you are, and the other people you're afraid of passing judgement are thinking about themselves 99.5% of the time, anyway. They're not going to make the effort to pass judgement.

She says "they will think I'm an silly person for having a plot that overlooks a valley with an interstate". She's very concerned about that and I cannot convince her that she won't be able to feel embarrassment.

Why do people care so much about things like that unless there's a meaningful consequence (e.g., the constant worry that we will die and someone will get our tools for half price at the cost of our spouse - if our spouse is materially affected by that - mine probably won't be - then it's an issue. If they won't be, then we should think about ourselves selling all of their decorations around the house - would we care? No. Why do we wind ourselves up about stuff like that? I don't at this point - knowing I won't be here, I don't care if whoever is left burns all of it. I just hope it's not a burden (and it won't be, because my spouse will give it all away to a haulage firm).
I have a very rich friend, in his 80s who is still accumulating stacks of money. He owns an American style Diner, where the Diner operators pay him £3,500 a month to rent. There are lots of things like that he is still involved with. He has 4 houses, full of Alchys, drug addicts and prostitutes that cause him gigantic headaches. He endures this for the £10,000 a month he makes out of them. He lives in a modest 4 bed house with a second hand car and a live apart GF. What he knows is that his 5 kids will squander his fortune so he has tried to tie everything in property. He loves money more than sex he says. I can believe.