Jameshow
Established Member
What about a car boot sale?
Need to escape/reset
- Thread starter Stigmorgan
- Start date
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Stanleymonkey
Established Member
Very happy to hear that things have turned a corner. A journey of a thousand miles has to start with a single step. Hopefully clearing a little space will make it easier to sort more stuff and suddenly you have a room cleared.
I would think that there are a large number of people who are struggling with a host of problems and it is not really there fault, I would blame the environment that we are now living in which is not great and is really toxic for a good happy life. We hear a great deal about mental health and yet are we really being open and honest about the potential causes. For the younger generations I can see why they are having issues and if I were there age in todays society I think I would feel the same. What do they have to look forward to, what is there to motivate and give them incentive to achieve? Education seems to be all about getting a degree, there are no longer as many big companies offering good career prospects that lead to high paid jobs, the cost of living is sky high and getting a roof over your head looks like a lifetime of debt with retirement at some ridiculous old age and then what happened to the teenage years between education and adulthood. They are also having to live wiith the threat of climate change and WW3 which they will see as a legacy left by us older folk. Now look at the older folk born in the fifties and sixties who have mostly had it ok upto later life, have seen the Uk when it was a much better place and are ok financially who now find themselves living in a very strange society where so many are now phone zombies, females are covered in tatoes and a culture of me, me and everything that was once working is now in a state of decline and collapse which also has a major input to mental health, it is in some ways worse because we have seen what was unlike the younger generation who have never seen the UK when it was a reasonably thriving country when in many ways things just happened. Change is much harder to accept as we get older, especially if it is for the worse.
MichaelChou
Established Member
I am really glad you updated this stig, im pleased for you. As Jacob said, one thing at a time. It’s great news. If she feels understood it will move steadily in the right direction, it sounds like she feels she can trust you.
Jester129
Established Member
I feel for the next generation. We had jobs in production, manufacturing etc. What do we make now? Nothing.
HamsterJam
Let’s take it apart to see what’s inside….
That’s good news. As others said, every journey starts with that most important first step and it sounds like you’ve taken a few already. There may be some bumps in the road but stay positive and communicate with your partner and I’m sure you’ll get it sorted.
You’ve got this!
You’ve got this!
I find sometimes it helps to make a competition of this sort of thing "who can find the most useless thing WE have kept" or "what is the oldest thing WE have kept" note the use of WE in both suggestions, stops the competitiveness getting personal, I am somewhat at the opposite end of this as I am the hoarder, I have a need to keep things as they may come in handy one day, when it starts to effect our lives WE start our competition.
Just checking in as promised , been a little busy of late but I’ve not forgotten so here we are . I’m hoping as others will no doubt will feel the same in that your situation has continued to improve even if it’s at a snail’s pace . Your post on the state of things in the uk and the lack of inspiration for the younger generation is very true . The uk has changed and has been doing so for years . I drop my moms papers off every morning to the care home as she would always have them when she had her flat . I can just about scan the front pages and it always the same political hype but worse is the senseless killings by the young against the young. Guns , knives , drugs ,money and god knows what else is driving these killings but it continues with very little done about it. Anyway hope your journey continues in a positive direction and you and your partners well being continues.. 
Stigmorgan
Established Member
Home is improving, after I cleared and cleaned the bathroom, resealed the bath and shower screen she made a start clearing the hallway and the smallest room, made me feel like my feelings were being considered for the first time in years, she got so much sorted I was happy to support her in going to see her cousin in Spain, she flew out there Friday morning and will be back in a day or two, the quiet has been beautiful, one of the hardest things I've had to adjust to is a lack of alone time, before covid hit she used to spend 4 or 5 whole weekends away at various dog shows and country fairs with the dogs, since we lost our Springer 2 years ago it's been too painful for her to go, so this weekend is my first on my own for a long time, still have the dogs here so can't spend the whole time in the makerspace but that's OKJust checking in as promised , been a little busy of late but I’ve not forgotten so here we are . I’m hoping as others will no doubt will feel the same in that your situation has continued to improve even if it’s at a snail’s pace . Your post on the state of things in the uk and the lack of inspiration for the younger generation is very true . The uk has changed and has been doing so for years . I drop my moms papers off every morning to the care home as she would always have them when she had her flat . I can just about scan the front pages and it always the same political hype but worse is the senseless killings by the young against the young. Guns , knives , drugs ,money and god knows what else is driving these killings but it continues with very little done about it. Anyway hope your journey continues in a positive direction and you and your partners well being continues..
Work was getting better until I found out that the CEO is planning to spend over £200K converting 3 of my classrooms into the academy HQ offices, yet I have a building in need of a new roof £100K, my main building boiler blew up a year ago £308K, tree works required based on an annual arborist report, a lot of it is dead wood above playground areas £10K, all of the children's toilets need refurbishing £££?, classrooms all desperately need new flooring, tables, chairs, blinds and redecorating at around £11K per room for 10 rooms, 5 fire escapes that need new exit steps because the current ones are rotten and collapsing £12K. So as you can imagine I'm feeling pretty disgusted at such an inappropriate waste of money, especially when I keep getting snarky comments passed down about things that need doing around site. I seriously doubt I will be here in a years time at the minute.
I’m not surprised that they can happily find 200k on new offices rather than bringing the actual school up to standard but what can you do about it - you could become a whistle blower but that could backfire on you and your family. It’s one of those should you or shouldn’t decisions. But your other news is brilliant- I’m very happy to hear that your partner has taken time out sounds like she has definitely turned the corner and I’m hopeful she will get better and better . The way she has addressed the cluttering and hoarding is great news . You speak of me time - that was part of my troubles. As between work , a new baby/ toddler + a partner that would not admit she wasn’t coping and that our son was showing signs of unusual behaviour. I’d never want to feel that way again. So keep it up, small steps not giant leaps , days out , evenings etc and of course time out for both of you to do your own things.. good on you and keep it upHome is improving, after I cleared and cleaned the bathroom, resealed the bath and shower screen she made a start clearing the hallway and the smallest room, made me feel like my feelings were being considered for the first time in years, she got so much sorted I was happy to support her in going to see her cousin in Spain, she flew out there Friday morning and will be back in a day or two, the quiet has been beautiful, one of the hardest things I've had to adjust to is a lack of alone time, before covid hit she used to spend 4 or 5 whole weekends away at various dog shows and country fairs with the dogs, since we lost our Springer 2 years ago it's been too painful for her to go, so this weekend is my first on my own for a long time, still have the dogs here so can't spend the whole time in the makerspace but that's OK
Work was getting better until I found out that the CEO is planning to spend over £200K converting 3 of my classrooms into the academy HQ offices, yet I have a building in need of a new roof £100K, my main building boiler blew up a year ago £308K, tree works required based on an annual arborist report, a lot of it is dead wood above playground areas £10K, all of the children's toilets need refurbishing £££?, classrooms all desperately need new flooring, tables, chairs, blinds and redecorating at around £11K per room for 10 rooms, 5 fire escapes that need new exit steps because the current ones are rotten and collapsing £12K. So as you can imagine I'm feeling pretty disgusted at such an inappropriate waste of money, especially when I keep getting snarky comments passed down about things that need doing around site. I seriously doubt I will be here in a years time at the minute.
I will never again trust a large company like I did with b .gas , and I’ll never let a job dictate my life either..Home is improving, after I cleared and cleaned the bathroom, resealed the bath and shower screen she made a start clearing the hallway and the smallest room, made me feel like my feelings were being considered for the first time in years, she got so much sorted I was happy to support her in going to see her cousin in Spain, she flew out there Friday morning and will be back in a day or two, the quiet has been beautiful, one of the hardest things I've had to adjust to is a lack of alone time, before covid hit she used to spend 4 or 5 whole weekends away at various dog shows and country fairs with the dogs, since we lost our Springer 2 years ago it's been too painful for her to go, so this weekend is my first on my own for a long time, still have the dogs here so can't spend the whole time in the makerspace but that's OK
Work was getting better until I found out that the CEO is planning to spend over £200K converting 3 of my classrooms into the academy HQ offices, yet I have a building in need of a new roof £100K, my main building boiler blew up a year ago £308K, tree works required based on an annual arborist report, a lot of it is dead wood above playground areas £10K, all of the children's toilets need refurbishing £££?, classrooms all desperately need new flooring, tables, chairs, blinds and redecorating at around £11K per room for 10 rooms, 5 fire escapes that need new exit steps because the current ones are rotten and collapsing £12K. So as you can imagine I'm feeling pretty disgusted at such an inappropriate waste of money, especially when I keep getting snarky comments passed down about things that need doing around site. I seriously doubt I will be here in a years time at the minute.
Stigmorgan
Established Member
Was speaking with one of the dads on my way to the shop yesterday, he works for a haulage firm based 5 minute walk from school, he said to let him know when I'm ready to leave and he can arrange a truck to move almost everything we have in one trip
so that's a weight off my shoulders, now there's nothing to stop me leaving when I'm ready to, definitely want to hold out until the summer holidays at least, partly to get stuff sorted in the house but also because I'm not finished with the school itself, there's a lot I still want to achieve within the grounds before I leave.Agent_zed
Established Member
Not sure how things are reported/recorded at the school you work at, but I wonder if doing a proper official looking report with risk assessments and priorities etc would help. Apart from anything else it covers you from being blamed if something happens. Much harder for the head (or governors) to say 'I wasn't told about X' if it is there is black and white (and photos as pictures do paint a thousand words).Home is improving, after I cleared and cleaned the bathroom, resealed the bath and shower screen she made a start clearing the hallway and the smallest room, made me feel like my feelings were being considered for the first time in years, she got so much sorted I was happy to support her in going to see her cousin in Spain, she flew out there Friday morning and will be back in a day or two, the quiet has been beautiful, one of the hardest things I've had to adjust to is a lack of alone time, before covid hit she used to spend 4 or 5 whole weekends away at various dog shows and country fairs with the dogs, since we lost our Springer 2 years ago it's been too painful for her to go, so this weekend is my first on my own for a long time, still have the dogs here so can't spend the whole time in the makerspace but that's OK
Work was getting better until I found out that the CEO is planning to spend over £200K converting 3 of my classrooms into the academy HQ offices, yet I have a building in need of a new roof £100K, my main building boiler blew up a year ago £308K, tree works required based on an annual arborist report, a lot of it is dead wood above playground areas £10K, all of the children's toilets need refurbishing £££?, classrooms all desperately need new flooring, tables, chairs, blinds and redecorating at around £11K per room for 10 rooms, 5 fire escapes that need new exit steps because the current ones are rotten and collapsing £12K. So as you can imagine I'm feeling pretty disgusted at such an inappropriate waste of money, especially when I keep getting snarky comments passed down about things that need doing around site. I seriously doubt I will be here in a years time at the minute.
It doesn't have to be accusatory or sensational, just pure facts of what the problem is, what the risks are and potential solutions.
Just a thought, if you haven't done this already. for me it would help get it out of my mind as you would know you have done everything you can, you can also make it clear to others that it has been properly recorded and is with the powers that be (and therefore not your problem).
Stigmorgan
Established Member
I have an active risk assessment on the building that I fill out every day and have done since February last year, it is on the academy server available for every emplyee to look at, I am able to log in and check who has looked at it and the CEO, who is well aware of its existence, has not once looked at it. I also have a file with every quote I've recieved and every denied project submission regarding the maintenance and repair of the building in question since the first time I tried to get it sorted in June 2018 so everyone who needs to be protected is and those who need to be held accountable if something goes wrong will be.
Terry - Somerset
Established Member
Agent zed has some good points - it may be useful to properly document the work needed around the school.
I assume the school, as a part of its governance process, produces a plan for the whole school normally updated at least annually. This is what any reasonably well managed company would do to help prioritise projects and plan cash flow. The site is a key component, obviously along with teaching staff, training, response to Ofsted reports etc etc..
Required - a list of individual projects, what needs to be done and why, what the costs may be, what the consequences are if the work is not done (H&S, increased costs of rectification, etc). Make it objective, include only that which you regard as material and a prioritise as not all can/will be done at once.
Don't feel tempted to add the nice to have (this could be a separate list), just those which are or will become (say over the next five years) abundantly necessary.
Offer to discuss it with management (their feedback would be valued!) or even (if you felt comfortable with it) present to a governors or general planning meeting. Make it a positive - you want the school to be the best it can be for the benefit of the pupils and staff.
Don't rake over old ground or conversations - despite your obvious frustration. It needs to be received as forward looking, with helpful intentions - not risk being perceived as just another whinge.
I assume the school, as a part of its governance process, produces a plan for the whole school normally updated at least annually. This is what any reasonably well managed company would do to help prioritise projects and plan cash flow. The site is a key component, obviously along with teaching staff, training, response to Ofsted reports etc etc..
Required - a list of individual projects, what needs to be done and why, what the costs may be, what the consequences are if the work is not done (H&S, increased costs of rectification, etc). Make it objective, include only that which you regard as material and a prioritise as not all can/will be done at once.
Don't feel tempted to add the nice to have (this could be a separate list), just those which are or will become (say over the next five years) abundantly necessary.
Offer to discuss it with management (their feedback would be valued!) or even (if you felt comfortable with it) present to a governors or general planning meeting. Make it a positive - you want the school to be the best it can be for the benefit of the pupils and staff.
Don't rake over old ground or conversations - despite your obvious frustration. It needs to be received as forward looking, with helpful intentions - not risk being perceived as just another whinge.
I spent over 30 years with bg . At one point after 20 years I left but went back after a year or so - In reality I should have not gone back but we live and learn. It was very difficult as the new management via the ceo started introducing ridiculous demands- targets that were not possible unless you compromised the safety of myself and the customers- I was not prepared to do this. Then there was sales targets that could only achieved by the hard sell methods- again this was not for me . Because I would do my job with the utmost diligence and care for my customers safety , their property and would often go above and beyond it was never enough, so it just got worse . In your situation it’s not only your job but your home but don’t let this keep you trapped in a job you have possibly lost faith in . Maybe a fresh start will do you both good, leave behind the bad memories and take the good ones with you . Not sure if you have had any professional help as yet but you are going in ghe right direction. Keep posting @Stigmorgan and keep the positive energy going..Was speaking with one of the dads on my way to the shop yesterday, he works for a haulage firm based 5 minute walk from school, he said to let him know when I'm ready to leave and he can arrange a truck to move almost everything we have in one trip
Stigmorgan
Established Member
They have recently introduced a spreadsheet (which im not against doing) for us to fill out for each school, it's taking time to fill out as instead of putting "carpets for all classrooms" they want each individual room and area listed then each thing that needs doing in that room/area with a priority rating, being a large 2 form primary school I have 14 classrooms (with over 420 children and 50+ members of staff) and a lot of grounds which means the spreadsheet is taking time to get done without interfering with my day to day tasks.
SammyQ
Established Member
Stig, Mucker, this is a common "delay" tactics used - particularly by established beaurocrats - to deflect and delay having to take action, or spend money. The next step is to "convene a working group" or similar tosh to have a talking shop instead of taking a (possibly) contentious decision. One particularly twatish addendum to this is to have at least one well-known "cynic" (read blowhard) on this committee. The cynic will then object to everything and stymie progress.
They - your Head - can then show 'the powers that be' that he is "establishing the BIG picture to give himself 'helicopter vision" and he has created a "working party" to look into, evaluate, price and prioritise".....
Any survivor/victim of any vaguely governmental employment will have umpteen similar war stories. The Civil Service and P.F.I. wallahs in particular have perfected this cowardly waste of time and talent. They should be forcibly given an enema of Sir Earnest Gowers "Complete Plain Words"...
They - your Head - can then show 'the powers that be' that he is "establishing the BIG picture to give himself 'helicopter vision" and he has created a "working party" to look into, evaluate, price and prioritise".....
Any survivor/victim of any vaguely governmental employment will have umpteen similar war stories. The Civil Service and P.F.I. wallahs in particular have perfected this cowardly waste of time and talent. They should be forcibly given an enema of Sir Earnest Gowers "Complete Plain Words"...
Jameshow
Established Member
Thanks I have a trustees meeting this week and needed some inspiration!!Stig, Mucker, this is a common "delay" tactics used - particularly by established beaurocrats - to deflect and delay having to take action, or spend money. The next step is to "convene a working group" or similar tosh to have a talking shop instead of taking a (possibly) contentious decision. One particularly twatish addendum to this is to have at least one well-known "cynic" (read blowhard) on this committee. The cynic will then object to everything and stymie progress.
They - your Head - can then show 'the powers that be' that he is "establishing the BIG picture to give himself 'helicopter vision" and he has created a "working party" to look into, evaluate, price and prioritise".....
Any survivor/victim of any vaguely governmental employment will have umpteen similar war stories. The Civil Service and P.F.I. wallahs in particular have perfected this cowardly waste of time and talent. They should be forcibly given an enema of Sir Earnest Gowers "Complete Plain Words"...
I know for sure that should you decide to leave your current job and your home it’s the kids you will miss , I suspect you will know many by name and others by face ,also many of the parents. There may also be some of the staff that you have got to know over your years there but don’t let these facts hold you back as after all said and done they are just that staff pupils and parents. I still see several of my x b g friends and every few months we have a drink or 12 and a curry. A few of the customers contact me for various jobs . Point is if you do leave the weight lifted of your shoulders will greatly outweigh any feelings of loss towards the staff pupils and parents.
You won’t see it straight away but you will say to yourself at some point why didn’t I do this sooner . Then if you intend to work elsewhere make sure it’s a job you enjoy and you one where you are valued and appreciated..
You won’t see it straight away but you will say to yourself at some point why didn’t I do this sooner . Then if you intend to work elsewhere make sure it’s a job you enjoy and you one where you are valued and appreciated..
