Lizards - Help please - DON'T laugh!

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You need a fishing rod, (without the hook). tie a slip knot in the line and the lizard will allow you to approach it up to a certain point. Use the rod to place the noose over it's head and pull tight. The professional lizard catchers figured out that as long as you are not too near the lizard you can catch them without having to chase after them.
 
You need a frozen pea and a hammer.

Place the frozen pea near the lizard's hidey-hole. When it comes out for a pee, hit it with the hammer.
 
NazNomad":fe6tnfc6 said:
You need a frozen pea and a hammer.

Place the frozen pea near the lizard's hidey-hole. When it comes out for a pee, hit it with the hammer.
youve been watching loony toons again, havent you?
 
Well we're glad this post has given everyone so much amusement, (hammer), but there's no news, sorry.

I should perhaps add that we don't use this room all that much (it was my office before I retired) and although there's computers & stuff here, we're not in here all the time, like if it was a sitting room or something.

Following the advice we were standing by with a cold water spray 2 days ago and when he appeared he got a good dose. He obviously didn't think much of that 'cos he disappeared at his usual high rate of knots, we think into a tiny gap behind a built-in cupboard, and since then he hasn't been seen again.

More news when/if he re-appears :D

Will keep you posted, but although we got a big weather improvement 2 days ago it's turned wet & rather un-seasonally cold again, so no idea when that will be.

But more likely, he's pretty fed up with the quality of the "humour" that's appearing on this thread :?:

AES :D
 
This is a shameless rip off from the internet, but its my favorite lizard joke.

A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of lizards. He pulls the guy over and says... "You can't drive around with lizards in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately." The guy says "OK"... and drives away. The next day, the officer sees the guy still driving around with the truck full of lizards, and they're all wearing sun glasses. He pulls the guy over and demands... "I thought I told you to take these lizards to the zoo yesterday?" The guy replies... "I did . . . today I'm taking them to the beach!"
 
Hate to interrupt the humour, but are lizards a protected species in Switzerland? If they are, this mught restrict your options. Might be worth checking with a local wildlife group. Never know, they might come and rehome for you?
 
As said earlier, I think that the black & yellow ones (called Salamanders here I think) are legally protected, but I don't know about the "ordinary" ones.

I can check, but it's hardly worth it right now 'cos as above, the little so and so has taken the day off (and the last 2 days too).

Whatever, I/we shall try not to harm him if/when he turns up again. As also said before, this is a basement room, wood panelled throughout, so there's loads of spiders around (judging by all the webs those little so-and-so s leave underneath the semi-built-in office desks and around all the computer/scanner/printer cabling).

AES

Edit for P.S: And when we had a badger colony under the house foundation slab (this house is built on the side of a steep slope) the local "forester chief" only came and delivered an aerosol full of REALLY stinky stuff designed to send wild boars on their way, otherwise it was all down to us. It did work but it didn't 'arf stink, and since we just blocked the entry up with big stones and concrete (after they'd cleared off I hasten to add) we've had no further problems with badgers here. But "lizzie" is a bit smaller and quicker than yer average badger - no idea where he is right now, but doubt if he's gone back out whichever way he came in 'cos it's miserable wet & cold here again.
 
Use the same technique you can use to get rid of a bird in the house. Secure the room. Close all the curtains except one, in front of an open window. The bird will fly to the light and through the open window. You lizard might do the same; although I doubt if he'll fly!

When I was in Malta, living ashore with SWIMBO, we lived with a lizard for weeks, (A little Gecko) He kept the files to zero. He had no fear of us, and would sometimes run across the back of the settee when we were sitting there smooching (or reading!)

I would tell you how we lost him, but it would be upsetting for anyone of a squeamish nature.

8)
 
Yeah we had a few when we lived in Asia (geckos or chit-chats). Kept the insect down, and anyway, parts of the flat was open to the open air anyway (neighbours downstairs always cooked breakfast with garlic, but that's a different story).

Our only concern here is to get him out before he dies of starvation n then stinks the place out - n without hurting him if at all poss. This house is NOT permanently open to the open air, just when we go out for a fag and open the windows to air the place out every morning in Winter (when the heating's on).

Still my innocent Q seems to have given a lot of harmless fun to some here :D

AES
 

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