Joke Thread 4

[nickds1]

"One does occasionally experiment with editing..."

 

[Cordy]

I don't want to die like Julius Caesar,

surrounded by friends.....

 

[Cordy]

No man is an Island, although my son Archie comes close

Jack Pelago

 

[Cordy]

I was abducted by Aliens.
I was made to - wash my hands, clean my room and eat all my vegatables.

Turns out

I was on the Mothership.

 

[Doug B]

 

[Amateur]

As a kid many happy hours were spent looking at the smutty seaside post cards. Life was simple then.

 

[stuart little]

Where have all the 'funnies' gone ? In the words of 'Francis' : "Not a 'titter' missus".

 

[Doug B]

 

[Phill05]

This one's for Stuart.

If a mouse fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it may need a ball replacement. Mouse balls are now available as FRU (Field Replacement Units).

Because of the delicate nature of this procedure, properly trained personnel should only attempt replacement of mouse balls.

Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by examining the underside of the mouse. Domestic balls will be larger and harder than foreign balls.

Ball removal procedures differ depending upon the manufacturer of the mouse. Foreign balls can be replaced using the pop off method. Domestic balls are replaced by using the twist off method. Mouse balls are not usually static sensitive.

However, excessive handling can result in sudden discharge.

Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used immediately.
It is recommended that each person have a pair of spare balls for maintaining optimum customer satisfaction.

Any customer missing his balls should contact the local personnel in charge of removing and replacing these necessary items.

Please keep in mind that a customer without properly working balls is an
unhappy customer.







We are talking about the mouse connected to your computer before someone complains.

 

[John Brown]

Gosh! That joke is showing its age...It's been a while since I had a mouse with a ball!

 

[Noel]

Surprise winner in Russian elections announced…

 

[Yorkieguy]

I don't want to die like Julius Caesar,

surrounded by friends.....

I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandad - unlike his passengers, who died in mortal terror.

 

[TRITON]

Come on Phil, this is a joke thread, so quit with the politicizing. Mahyar-Tousi is a known Nigel Farage fanboy and right winger

 

[Phil Pascoe]

As opposed the relentess diet of left wing rubbish you feed us.

 

[Phil Pascoe]

Come on Phil, this is a joke thread, so quit with the politicizing. Mahyar-Tousi is a known Nigel Farage fanboy and right winger

Come on Triton, this is a joke thread, so quit with the politicizing.

 

[Doug B]

 

[stuart little]

Come on Phil, this is a joke thread, so quit with the politicizing. Mahyar-Tousi is a known Nigel Farage fanboy and right winger

WHO?

 

[Keith Cocker]

Come on Triton, this is a joke thread, so quit with the politicizing.

Totally unnecessary comment

 

[Phil Pascoe]

And his wasn't. Brilliant.

 

[mc281]

As a kid many happy hours were spent looking at the smutty seaside post cards. Life was simple then.

View attachment 177648

My favourite is still...