tsb
Established Member
SWMBO has shown me this list. I can't disagree with it and could add a few more but I'm scared to....
MEN'S RULES
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally , the guys' side of the story
( I must admit, it's pretty good)
We always hear
'the rules'
From the female side
Now here are the rules from the male side
These are our rules!
Please note.. they are all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.We
need it up, you need it down.You don't hear us complaining about you
leaving it down.
1.Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail, and witchcraft
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one! Subtle hints do not
work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what
we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact,
all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
done.Not both.If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A
color.Pumpkin is also a fruit.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like
nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the
hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
you don't want to hear..
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
fine... Really!
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as Football or golf.
1. You have enough clothes.
1.You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.Yes, I know I have to sleep on the
couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that?It's like
camping.
Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh..
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a laugh.
MEN'S RULES
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally , the guys' side of the story
( I must admit, it's pretty good)
We always hear
'the rules'
From the female side
Now here are the rules from the male side
These are our rules!
Please note.. they are all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.We
need it up, you need it down.You don't hear us complaining about you
leaving it down.
1.Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail, and witchcraft
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one! Subtle hints do not
work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what
we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact,
all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
done.Not both.If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A
color.Pumpkin is also a fruit.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like
nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the
hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
you don't want to hear..
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
fine... Really!
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as Football or golf.
1. You have enough clothes.
1.You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.Yes, I know I have to sleep on the
couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that?It's like
camping.
Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh..
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a laugh.
