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stuart little

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Two armed robbers go into a bank. Both are masked up and have sawn-off shotguns. One robber goes up to a cashier and points the shotgun at him. He looks at the cashier with surprise for a moment or two, and then calls out to his mate:

"Strewth John! This bloke could be your double!"
Memories of:- "Don't tell him your name, Pike! :ROFLMAO:
 

Robbo3

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Roy Rogers is appearing in a rodeo in a little town in Texas miles from anywhere.

The night before the rodeo he puts a brand new pair of cowboy boots outside the door of his motel room to be polished. In the morning he opens the door and finds his boots have been badly clawed up and chewed by what appears to be a wild animal. Enraged, he organises a posse to hunt down the animal.

After a chase, the posse corners a cougar with boot polish on its face. They despatch the snarling animal and return to the waiting Roy at the hotel with the carcass.

The head of the posse holds up the carcass and says "Pardon me Roy - is this the cat that chewed your new shoes?"
 

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