Joke Thread III

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I have often wondered who the person was that first looked at a prawn or a lobster and thought "Hmm - that looks really tasty!"

Probably thoughts went something like:

"I am so hungry I could eat anything. Hmmm? What about that?"
Funny how little things remind you of other stuff....these sports jokes sprang to mind after my better half offered me a Polo. Apologies if they've been featured before : perhaps even by me!

Football commentator interviewing David Beckham...
"Good first half, David. The second coming up in a few minutes - dare I ask your chosen tactics?"
"Lime and lemon, I think. Nicer than the mints...."

And allegedly a true story about Fred Truman, about his apparent regular habit of breaking violent wind no matter where he was.
Seated somewhere next to a young lady, he let fly.
Supposedly he looked at the young girl and spoke out loud..."Don't be embarrassed, lass...they'll just think it was me anyway...."
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