Joke Thread 4
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Doug B
Shy Tot
Doug B
Shy Tot
Alex H
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Alex H
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Jaco
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ierish medickail dickshonairy
stuart little
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That's handy!
The_Yellow_Ardvark
Established Member
Not sure if this is just a funny story, or a confession.
I had a deadpan situation develop. The type that would make Jimmy Carr out to be an amateur.
So.
I am out on a Sunday to the local Morrisons supermarket. Place is pretty quiet of customers and staff and I go to the deli counter.
OK, at the deli counter I'm ordering some sliced garlic sausage, some salami, but what I hate is they slice it with the plastic casing on,which i then have to try to pick out.
So I ask the young girl who is serving me to cut 1/4lb of sausage,but to first remove the plastic outside casing before slicing and i put it badly.
I ask her "Can you slice such and such, cut it thin, and....can you pull the skin back for me please".
Oh Sh**
She looks at me, and I at her. Im in my 50's and i would guess she is about 16, on a Sunday part time job.
I suddenly realize if I burst out laughing, the manager is going to get called, I can foresee the cops arriving next
I Must Not Laugh.
She is looking at me in a quizzical fashion, like she heard what I said, but was it what was meant, was it some sort of sexual verbal assault. I have to bluff this one out.
So I kind of explain that the plastic casing gets cut into it and i need to pick it out and OH ...can I also have...
I put the sliced sausage in the basket and quickly left.
Surprised at myself that I didnt erupt into laughter. It was a conscious effort to remain calm, I could feel the laughter trying to let go but I knew that would end badly. I mean she was working there, so would have to be a set age, but she looked really young. 16 and as it was Sunday she could even be 15.
Funny though.
I had a deadpan situation develop. The type that would make Jimmy Carr out to be an amateur.
So.
I am out on a Sunday to the local Morrisons supermarket. Place is pretty quiet of customers and staff and I go to the deli counter.
OK, at the deli counter I'm ordering some sliced garlic sausage, some salami, but what I hate is they slice it with the plastic casing on,which i then have to try to pick out.
So I ask the young girl who is serving me to cut 1/4lb of sausage,but to first remove the plastic outside casing before slicing and i put it badly.
I ask her "Can you slice such and such, cut it thin, and....can you pull the skin back for me please".
Oh Sh**
She looks at me, and I at her. Im in my 50's and i would guess she is about 16, on a Sunday part time job.
I suddenly realize if I burst out laughing, the manager is going to get called, I can foresee the cops arriving next
I Must Not Laugh.
She is looking at me in a quizzical fashion, like she heard what I said, but was it what was meant, was it some sort of sexual verbal assault. I have to bluff this one out.
So I kind of explain that the plastic casing gets cut into it and i need to pick it out and OH ...can I also have...
I put the sliced sausage in the basket and quickly left.
Surprised at myself that I didnt erupt into laughter. It was a conscious effort to remain calm, I could feel the laughter trying to let go but I knew that would end badly. I mean she was working there, so would have to be a set age, but she looked really young. 16 and as it was Sunday she could even be 15.
Funny though.
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