This would be me

[smoggy49]

Phone call
"Honey it's me. I don't want to alarm you but I was hit by a car as I was leaving the office.
Wendy brought me to the hospital.
They have checked me over and done some tests and some x-rays.
The blow to my head was severe.
Fortunately it did not cause any serious internal injury.
However I have three broken ribs, a compound fracture in the left leg,
and they think they may have to amputate my right foot."

Wife’s Response:

"Who's this Wendy then?"

And if you find that hard to believe, you've never been married

 

[RossJarvis]

Hmm, reminds me of many years ago having been cut out of a car by the fire brigade, suffering a broken collar bone and various cuts and abrasions, I phoned my mother who said "You've done what to the car?!!".

 

[Random Orbital Bob]

=D> =D> =D>

 

[gregmcateer]

excellent!

 

[rafezetter]

Sadly this is true - I know a guy who almost cut his lower arm off with a chop saw, and when his wife visited him in hospital, all she was worried about was who was going to look after the kids while she went to bingo.

No surprise 6 months later they were divorced.