This will brighten up your day !!!!!!

[Toydesigner]

Didn't see it actually happen. Simply saw the end result, and asked the neighbours.
Our local Post Master, & Hardware store owners had a perfect view of proceedings ;-
Local home owner had a very large Aussie Gum tree which had one limb overhanging his house. He checked out ALL the licensed Tree Pruning Service providers,- considered them all, " Too dear. " then he checked out the hire of a mobile trailer-mounted Cherry-picker, which he also considered," too expensive," ( he's not short of a Dollar, -owns Four cars including a Jag,- simply a bit on the," stingy," side ).
Desided to construct his own scaffolding using old rusty waterpiping, ropes, and oddment floorboards, etc. which he did. Built it just off to one side of the overhanging limb,- but he had to move some of his car collection first,- and, ( believe it or not ), parked his Jag almost directly underneath the overhanging limb !!! He also climbed up onto the house roof and attached a double thickness of fishingline to the leafy end of the limb, and secured the free ends at about ground level to the base of his leaning, rickety, boundry fence on the opposite side of the house. First he tried to cut the limb with a handsaw, but was a good couple of metres short of the limb, so he went and borrowed a small chainsaw from someone, attached a length of metal pipe to the chainsaw handle with heaps of tape, made sure the throttle was wide open, clambered back up his scaffolding,
got chainsaw started,( with difficulty ), then set to work to cut limb,- the idea actually worked,- to a point !! Cut limb OK on an angle, then he DROPPED the chainsaw, motor screaming, straight down and through the Windscreen of his Jag, closely followed by the limb, which was nicely shaped like a spear, straight into the Jag's roof,-and through. As for the fishing line,- that snapped like a giant rubber-band, and wiplashed back, with the old fence literally, " dying of fright," and ended up on its flat across the footpath!! Also to add insult to injury,- The large limb collected a Brick chimney on its way down to terra-firma, with the dislodged bricks also," peppering," his Jag !! Guy's wife came tearing out of the house to see what all the commotion was about,- apparently a few very choice descriptive words were heard by all and sundry. The Post Master, and the Hardware Store Owners nearly doubled-up with laughter. =D> =D> As for the owner,- he STILL has the Jag sitting there in his yard STILL with the branch speared through it, bricks everywhere, still with wrecked fence, ( simply propped it back up ), He can't claim insurance as he didn't have anything insured,- THAT cost a valuable thing called, " Money !! ", also he had a habit of telling everyone that, " insurance is a scam, " Several locals with camera-phones scored some photos.

"ave a good day, - and a good larf !!!
Roger

 

[adidat]

photos or it didn't happen!! great story roger!

adidat

 

[Toydesigner]

Oh yeah it happened oright mate. I DON'T currently have a decent digital camera at present, otherwise there would be some added photos to show proof. ( waiting on local electronics store to send out their quarterly," specials" catalogue, and a decent digital camera is about Aust $300. around here, AND about Aust$150. when on "Special," so If I can save myself about half the normal price I will. ( Don't use online shopping as been scammed by a FAKE Paypal bill,- on something I never even bought !! ).
** If you want to view the mess for yourself, your are quite welcome to," hop aboard the next plane to Adelaide," hire a car upon arrival at Adelaide International Airport for a few days, drive 200 km to Port Vincent, and I can personally show you the end result for yourself,- even speak to, " scrooge, " himself if you wish to, then I can take you for a drive and show you some of our local counrtyside, even meet some Aussie farmers, and local identities.
By the way, someone sent in a photo to our local regional newspaper last week, with the caption underneath, " How NOT to prune a tree. " Result everyone on the Yorke Peninsula region of South Australia who reads the local newspaper knows about the story, or at least of the Photo,- unfortunately I have NOT devised a way to scan a photo from a newspaper without the photo going all," Yukky," and out of focus,- maybe you know how to do this, ( I tried without success ),
'ave a happy day,
Roger

 

[Benchwayze]

Tony,

He sounds like a guy who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing!

Great laugh... :lol: :lol: :lol:

Thanks.

 

[JakeS]

unfortunately I have NOT devised a way to scan a photo from a newspaper without the photo going all," Yukky," and out of focus,- maybe you know how to do this

I imagine the problem you're probably having is that most newspapers are printed in dots of the four primary printing colours (cyan, magenta, yellow and black) and the eye just sees many dots at once and interprets it as a particular colour. On one hand this can cause blotchy problems with colours because the CCD on your scanner samples very precise points of the newspaper and assumes that the nearby areas are the same colour, so sometimes it reads a magenta dot and other times it reads a bit of yellowy-white paper, and so on... and on the other hand the regular nature of the pattern of dots causes moire patterns to appear in the scanned image.


The only way I know of to deal with it isn't perfect, but it's thankfully quite easy: simply scan in at a ridiculously high resolution - 1200dpi or so, whatever your scanner can do. Like this, the scanner samples each of the little dots individually, and you can then resample the image down to a smaller size using whatever your favourite image editor on the PC is - Paint.NET is a pretty good free one if you don't have anything already. When you resample (nearly all paint programs will do this when you tell it to 'resize') the software will average several pixels in the source image down to a single colour, and thus do the same job your eye does when it looks at the printed image.

(It's also often worth putting black card or similar behind the page when scanning, because otherwise the bright light of the scanner goes through the paper and you see the image of the ink on the opposite side of the newspaper page!)

 

[Benchwayze]

In addition you could put the scanned image through your Photo-Editing suite and use a filter to remove the 'imperfections'.
Eg. Noise, despeckle, or Moiree', or whatever your program calls the clean-up process. Sometimes that's all you need do. It smooths out the imperfections and Robert's your Mother's Brother.

HTH
John

 

[Michael7]

Sometimes it's better to admit defeat and pay someone to do the job for you. Last year I tried to repaint a corrugated roof. I had just finished sanding with a drill and wire brush bit when I put a foot on a corrugated skylight and fell 16-18 feet on a concrete floor, just beside an oil drum. Looking from above the skylight looked so much like the rest of the roof. It's a miracle I only had a fractured wrist. I got back up on the roof and finished the job but was a lot more wary.

Michael