Joke Thread 4

[Cordy]

Global warming is temporarily out of order due to cold weather.
----------------------

I've been paying £2 a month to the Cats Protection League for over a year.....
I missed only two payments and they've just been round and broken my cat's legs....

 

[Doug B]

 

[Cozzer]

Unfortunate positioning of a speech bubble....

 

[Doug B]

 

[Sgian Dubh]

GUIDANCE FROM THE AA FOR TRAVELLING IN ICY CONDITIONS​

When travelling in icy conditions you should take with you a shovel, blankets/sleeping bag, extra clothing including scarf, warm socks, hat and gloves, stout boots and/or wellington boots, 24 hour supply of food and water, de-icer, rock salt, torch and spare batteries, a can of fuel (diesel or petrol), first aid kit, and jump leads.

I felt a right berk travelling prepared like this on the bus!

 

[bushwhaker]

Just had a big argument with my wife about going on vacation...
I wanted to go to Rome, and she wanted to come along.

 

[Vulcan]

 

[The_Yellow_Ardvark]

 

[Alex H]

 

[Doug B]

 

[The_Yellow_Ardvark]

 

[The_Yellow_Ardvark]

 

[Amateur]

 

[Amateur]

 

[Amateur]

View attachment 174109

Or as the doctor, holding his stethoscope, said to the female patient......
"Big breaths"
And she said,
"Yeth,and I'm only thithteen"

 

[Doug B]

 

[Vulcan]

 

[bushwhaker]

It's funny!

 

[Vulcan]

 

[Vulcan]