Tony Spear
Established Member
Mike Garnham":2bzmfxpr said:
Would those be the ones invented by Rob Andrew and Florence Gladioli then?
When I Rule the World.....
- Thread starter MikeG.
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Would those be the ones invented by Rob Andrew and Florence Gladioli then?
MikeG.
Established Member
No, the rules that say that only the captain may address the referee, and even he must call him sir. I can see the footballers struggling with that one a bit.
Mike
Mike
MikeG.
Established Member
The following is possibly the most important change of all those that I shall impose. Before I hand it down let me make it clear that I only intend to rule for as short a time as is necessary to to get things straight, before I hand back to a revised form of democrat leadership.
So, my rule number one: every new law put through every parliament in the world must be accompanied by the repeal of 3 existing laws.
The upshot is that there will come a point where governments think very carefully indeed before introducing any legislation at all.
Mike
So, my rule number one: every new law put through every parliament in the world must be accompanied by the repeal of 3 existing laws.
The upshot is that there will come a point where governments think very carefully indeed before introducing any legislation at all.
Mike
Mike Garnham":1r8vkhxr said:
You have a lot of good things going, but this last one is pure genius!
That would have seen to a lot of troubles out of the way without a lot of new trouble introduced like it is now.
May i, ever so humbly as i stand afore thee, mighty king, also suggest that all lawmakers would be expected to live under the laws which they have imposed, with the people it affects, for a certain period of time to ensure that the law is good and righteous?
(Small edit: No misspellings found! YAY! )
wobblycogs
Established Member
King Mike might I suggest...
Perhaps better than that every law passed must have a sunset clause. Unless it is debated and renewed it must be struck from the statute books. That should make sure that the seriously reduced number of politicians only have time to ensure that the most important laws remain on the books.
Every politician must also attend parliament everyday and must not have another job paid or otherwise. Pay will be whatever the national average is for that year. A small house will be provided for those who live more than 50 miles from the parliament building.
Punishment for acting improperly while in office is being fed to a dinosaur or impaled on improbably large antlers (the victim gets to pick - I thin that's fairer).
A new parliament building will be built, out side London, that will be energy efficient and allow proper interaction between the people and parliament. All forms of anti-terrorist measures will be removed. General elections will be scrapped in favour of each area replacing their MP when the time is due. What with no laws passed in the run up to an election and none passed just after and summer breaks it's a miracle they have managed to pass so many rubbish laws.
It will be possible to replace your local MP by getting a petition together showing a lack of confidence. All local councilors will be fed to dinosaurs and the positions removed (we only need one set of rulers thank you). Local councils will be merged to take advantage of economies of scale and stop duplication of work. Councils will only be allowed to deal with matters that are specific to their local area. National services will be run centralized and run at a national level perhaps with small branch offices around the country.
Finally, government departments must, by law, talk to each other. This is particularly true of HRMC and Companies House the employees of which will be all fed to dinosaurs if either of them loses my companies tax return again this year!
Perhaps better than that every law passed must have a sunset clause. Unless it is debated and renewed it must be struck from the statute books. That should make sure that the seriously reduced number of politicians only have time to ensure that the most important laws remain on the books.
Every politician must also attend parliament everyday and must not have another job paid or otherwise. Pay will be whatever the national average is for that year. A small house will be provided for those who live more than 50 miles from the parliament building.
Punishment for acting improperly while in office is being fed to a dinosaur or impaled on improbably large antlers (the victim gets to pick - I thin that's fairer).
A new parliament building will be built, out side London, that will be energy efficient and allow proper interaction between the people and parliament. All forms of anti-terrorist measures will be removed. General elections will be scrapped in favour of each area replacing their MP when the time is due. What with no laws passed in the run up to an election and none passed just after and summer breaks it's a miracle they have managed to pass so many rubbish laws.
It will be possible to replace your local MP by getting a petition together showing a lack of confidence. All local councilors will be fed to dinosaurs and the positions removed (we only need one set of rulers thank you). Local councils will be merged to take advantage of economies of scale and stop duplication of work. Councils will only be allowed to deal with matters that are specific to their local area. National services will be run centralized and run at a national level perhaps with small branch offices around the country.
Finally, government departments must, by law, talk to each other. This is particularly true of HRMC and Companies House the employees of which will be all fed to dinosaurs if either of them loses my companies tax return again this year!
MikeG.
Established Member
Wobblycogs making an early application for the post of chief assistant to the assistant chief in my regime.....noted.
Fecn
Established Member
wobblycogs":1mfsythn said:
I would like to suggest an improvement on this policy. Rather than providing small houses for thouse who live more than 50 miles away, how about turning part of the houses of parliament into a dormitary. That way the politicians would be able to save on commuting time and expenses, spend more time at their desks and provide better value to the taxpayers.
MikeG.
Established Member
Fecn":3b3a4dz8 said:
Have you considered the possibility that the MPs might then breed?
Mike
dedee
Established Member
Surely when MG rules the world there will be no need for parliament nor MPs
Please can you keep cricket though?
Andy
Please can you keep cricket though?
Andy
TrimTheKing
Established Member
You've obviously forgotten that there is only one King around here Mr Garnham (your official title in my Kingdom).Mike Garnham":3idbhlyr said:
Can I assume that this post is open admittance of your treason against me?
MikeG.
Established Member
Another rebellion! And before I have even assumed power......Luckily, for you Mark, the death penalty will be eternally outlawed in my new world.
Andy, parliament will remain in an unpaid advisory capacity for the 2 or 3 years it takes me to straighten everything out, then I will hand power back to them under the new rules.
Mike
Andy, parliament will remain in an unpaid advisory capacity for the 2 or 3 years it takes me to straighten everything out, then I will hand power back to them under the new rules.
Mike
big soft moose
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Henning":1ittdxue said:
and any national leader who proposes or declares war on another nation will have to fight in that war and lead from the front as a leader should.
wobblycogs
Established Member
Not just them but their entire familiy as well should have to fight in the war, on the front line doing the most dangerous jobs. Anyone else expect a sudden out break of peace.
Chris J
Member
Once mark steps down I will be voted as Life Dictator by the new democratic government (if they know which side of the bread is buttered).
Then I will.
Close the stock exchange and take back all utility companies into public ownership.
Stop banks making loans to business, only allow them to broker deals between business and investors thereby making investors true partners in any business they loan to. No trading in shares allowed outside of existing shareholders.
Everyone will pay the same rate of tax, no loopholes, no offshore earnings. Tax will be paid on all "foreign" income brought into the country.
VAT & PAYE will be abolished. There will be massive fines for employing people who are not registered or have work permits.
6 months notice of the ending of unemployment benefits. Old age pension payments doubled immediately.
Proper assessment of people claiming disability, after assessment that will also be doubled.
I will bring back all troops to this country and stop interfering in other peoples problems unless under UN direction. Immigration policies to be strengthen, no more "refugees". Immigrants to prove they can support themselves or have employment and are able to speak English and have no criminal convictions within six months of landing or visa will be revoked.
Detention centres to be be set up for petty criminals to attend, Friday night until Sunday night to enable them to keep jobs and family life intact. Violent criminals will not be allowed this privilege.
MP's will be paid a decent salary and only allowed to reclaim a fixed sum for expenses based upon the mileage from their constituency, this will be linked to public transport costs and hours present in Parliament. County hall will be reclaimed for the nation and used to provide accommodation for overnight stays.
Life peers will be thanked for their contributions and allowed to retire. All other will have to be voted in by the public. The same will go for the judiciary and chief constables.
There will be a review of all expenditure on the royal family. Only the Monarch and the first in line will be paid out of the public purse. All royal possessions & property (other than Windsor Castle and Buckingham Palace) will be reviewed to determine ownership. Almost certainly the vast majority will be returned to public ownership.
Death penalty will be available to the judiciary, life will mean life.
It's about time we (the people) took over this country and my Government will do it for us.
(That's a decent start for now)
Then I will.
Close the stock exchange and take back all utility companies into public ownership.
Stop banks making loans to business, only allow them to broker deals between business and investors thereby making investors true partners in any business they loan to. No trading in shares allowed outside of existing shareholders.
Everyone will pay the same rate of tax, no loopholes, no offshore earnings. Tax will be paid on all "foreign" income brought into the country.
VAT & PAYE will be abolished. There will be massive fines for employing people who are not registered or have work permits.
6 months notice of the ending of unemployment benefits. Old age pension payments doubled immediately.
Proper assessment of people claiming disability, after assessment that will also be doubled.
I will bring back all troops to this country and stop interfering in other peoples problems unless under UN direction. Immigration policies to be strengthen, no more "refugees". Immigrants to prove they can support themselves or have employment and are able to speak English and have no criminal convictions within six months of landing or visa will be revoked.
Detention centres to be be set up for petty criminals to attend, Friday night until Sunday night to enable them to keep jobs and family life intact. Violent criminals will not be allowed this privilege.
MP's will be paid a decent salary and only allowed to reclaim a fixed sum for expenses based upon the mileage from their constituency, this will be linked to public transport costs and hours present in Parliament. County hall will be reclaimed for the nation and used to provide accommodation for overnight stays.
Life peers will be thanked for their contributions and allowed to retire. All other will have to be voted in by the public. The same will go for the judiciary and chief constables.
There will be a review of all expenditure on the royal family. Only the Monarch and the first in line will be paid out of the public purse. All royal possessions & property (other than Windsor Castle and Buckingham Palace) will be reviewed to determine ownership. Almost certainly the vast majority will be returned to public ownership.
Death penalty will be available to the judiciary, life will mean life.
It's about time we (the people) took over this country and my Government will do it for us.
(That's a decent start for now)
mrfixit
Established Member
^ And any survivors eaten. :wink:
MikeG.
Established Member
Sorry Chris. I'm in charge. Mark is dreaming....and so are you.
Never ever in my world will the great unwashed get to vote for anyone involved in policing or the judiciary. Only the wholly uncivilised (and yes, I know what I am saying) would go down that route. That way leads to the equivalent of legalised lynch mobs.
Now, go and sit down in your place at the back, and await my next edicts.
Mike
uh oh, the dinosaurs are back!! I hadn't anticpated having a velociraptor problem to sort out along with all the human issues.
Never ever in my world will the great unwashed get to vote for anyone involved in policing or the judiciary. Only the wholly uncivilised (and yes, I know what I am saying) would go down that route. That way leads to the equivalent of legalised lynch mobs.
Now, go and sit down in your place at the back, and await my next edicts.
Mike
uh oh, the dinosaurs are back!! I hadn't anticpated having a velociraptor problem to sort out along with all the human issues.
wobblycogs
Established Member
Wow, I'm getting confused about who's going to be king now. Might start putting myself forward...
Anyway, I'd scrap stamp duty and death duty. Very few people put themselves though the stress of moving house for the fun of it and it seems unfair to penalize people because they have to move for work. Death duty is paid on money that has already been taxed once.
Anyway, I'd scrap stamp duty and death duty. Very few people put themselves though the stress of moving house for the fun of it and it seems unfair to penalize people because they have to move for work. Death duty is paid on money that has already been taxed once.
