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studders

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"This reminds me of the time my pet gerbil called me at work to let me know my house was on fire. I rushed home to find him fighting the fire with my portable extinguisher. Animals are really amazing!"



:lol: :lol: :lol:
 

Digit

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I use to run a pet shop and bred Hamsters. A chap came to see me to buy some studs and stuck his fingers in the cage.
'I wouldn't do that,' I suggested.
'Why, do they bite?'
'Only when they're hungry,' I suggested.
'How do you know when YIKES!!!!'

Roy.
 

Jonzjob

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No, 'suppose they don't? Especially if you eat them? Supposed to be a delicacy somewhere, lightly fried :shock:

Or if you are a 'comedian' you can just pop them whole in yer mouth on camera :twisted:
 

Jonzjob

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No! I ain't talking about an silly person who eats tiny ortolan birds on camera. It's been totally illegal to hunt or eat them for several years before the clown did it on TV. I meant a so called 'comedian' and a hampster.

Comme ça

 

gus3049

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I won't bore you with the whole shaggy dog story but......

There was this Dutch person in who bred hamsters and he had the strange idea that if he boiled them up, added a bit of sugar he could sell the jam as something a bit different in his pet shop.

Trouble is that every time he tried the same thing happened - tulips started growing out of the pot.

The long and short of it is - of course -

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that tulips come from Hamsterjam :roll:
 

Digit

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I'ts that French wine wot does it! :lol:

Roy.
 

Jonzjob

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Oh dear Gordon, I am so very glad I didn't post that :arrow: :arrow: :arrow: Way out..

Not the wine I drink mate! I think he's bin on the absenthe and as they say "absenthe makes the heart grow and the mind shrink". And I'll bet just like Picaso he can't paint :mrgreen: Well, maybe the odd wall?
 

gus3049

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Jonzjob":54jlhsth said:
Oh dear Gordon, I am so very glad I didn't post that :arrow: :arrow: :arrow: Way out..

Not the wine I drink mate! I think he's bin on the absenthe and as they say "absenthe makes the heart grow and the mind shrink". And I'll bet just like Picaso he can't paint :mrgreen: Well, maybe the odd wall?
If I could paint half as badly as Picasso, I'd be a happy man. The word 'genius' is grossly overused these days but Picasso rates right up at the top for me.

One of my efforts attached just to prove I do more than paint walls, even after a pint or two of the red stuff. I think I can just see a small plaque under there somewhere which reminds me that I must start up the lathe again and get turnin'

I'm glad I didn't post the full version of that joke as it takes about twenty minutes to tell :shock:
 

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Benchwayze

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Gus,

It is not so widely known that Picaso was an extremely competent representational painter too.
I think it's just that some of his abstract work is not so easily understood. Like Jazz in comparison to the 'I like to recognise The Tune' philosophies!
I can't see your picture too well as it's on the slant, as it were, but it looks pretty competent to me.

Not the way I paint, but that's because I can only paint trees and rivers! :D :D :D
 

gus3049

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Benchwayze":5fo4sfol said:
Gus,
It is not so widely known that Picaso was an extremely competent representational painter too.
Indeed, when I was studying at Camberwell in the 70's, we spent considerable time examining artist's work before they got famous. I don't trust any artist to have anything meaningful to say unless he/she or it is capable of accurately reproducing whatever the subject is representationally (is there such a word? The spell checker didn't blink)

Probably just shows my age. Us old gits apparently think you need to have studied a subject in depth and put in the time in order to gain competence. Very old fashioned view.
 

Benchwayze

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Representational? I think it's a word. To me it means paintings people can understnd what they represent, without any effort. Not always my finished work sadly! But I paint impressionist style anyway.. (Well I try to!) :lol: :lol: :lol:
 

Jonzjob

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I think that is one of the main things that anoys me about Picaso, in that he WAS such a good artist and actually knew that a person has an eye either side of their nose. I haven't studied any kind of art at any kind of school. But I do know what I like.

I also like jazz, or some of it. I am not a fan of a groupe of players tuning up and calling it music, a bit like Bengi Britain..
 

gus3049

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Jonzjob":187nq4n2 said:
I think that is one of the main things that anoys me about Picaso, in that he WAS such a good artist and actually knew that a person has an eye either side of their nose. I haven't studied any kind of art at any kind of school. But I do know what I like.

I also like jazz, or some of it. I am not a fan of a groupe of players tuning up and calling it music, a bit like Bengi Britain..
You just ain't been 'sensitized' mate!

Add another dash of absynthe to the mix and I'm sure it will all make sense.
 
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