Lost my Mojo

[Penny]

I've not been on the forum much lately. Nor have I been in the workshop.

See, I suffer from two major ailments. I have a badly damaged spine which leaves me in constant pain, only the degree changes. And I also suffer from a form of PTSD which often leaves me depressed, suffering anxiety attacks and Agoraphobia.

At the moment my Mojo is most definitely AWOL. I have things that I need to get on with, or things my OH wants done, but I can't work up any enthusiasm or inclination to get anything done. I just want to hide away from the world and let my brain go blank.

Does this happen to anyone else? What do they do about it?

 

[richarnold]

Hi Penny.
I can't realy imagine what your situation is like, and won't even pretend to, but I do suffer from bouts of depression, and do know what it feels like to have no enthusiasm for anything. My method is to take small steps. I will go into the workshop, put some of my most loved music on, have a good clean up, maybe sharpen a few of my favourite hand tools, and perhaps just plane a bit of beautiful wood for the joy of it. It doesn't always work, but I always know that no matter how dark it gets I will always fight it.
Cheers, Richard

 

[lanemaux]

Fighting a problem like depression ,PTSD or any other of the " clouds overhead at all times" maladies is a bit like going into a prize fight with your legs tied together. My own little downer is a stage 4 prostate betrayal , a bit mentally troublesome. As cliché as it sounds , my only response was to not let it get me down, or to carry on the fight metaphor , bite the buggers ankles from the mat! What helps me is to look on each day as another one that got pulled from the loss column to the win column. Family and friends are a tonic as well, more days with them goes into the win column as well. My physical condition ain't great , weak and a bit breakable , brain is still sharp enough though. I'm calling that a win then as well.Music , art , film, theatre,win, win, win, win.And of course this lot here on the UKworkshop and all the vast amusement on the subject of sharpening, the support of kind members and shining memories of some of the members now sadly gone and fondly reflected upon. Experiences undiminished by poignancy. Got to count as a win just to have had the chance for those. Now with a winning record like that , well , I figure I can soldier on with a grin and maybe even pass one on as well.

 

[Racers]

I had 6 mouths off with stress/depression so I know how hard it can be, but I was physically fit so not as bad as you.
Keep trying and it does get better, apart from the ups and down but they do level off eventually.

Pete

 

[Benchwayze]

Penny.

I know the feeling too. But not often thankfully. I endorse what Rich says. It is one way of easing the mind back on track.

best of luck.

 

[SammyQ]

Penny, in my job I've met and listened to many servicemen. Several of my former pupils are serving today. Despite that, I can only begin to imagine what PTSD does to a mind. I certainly would not feel qualified or entitled to comment.

With depression, I - and others here - can speak about medication, CBT, other therapies. The lethargy or lack of enthusiasm you speak of is all too common a companion and it can linger until it seems to be your who!e existence. Rich wrote above about finding something small and pleasurable, even as small as cleaning one chisel, while listening to music. That works. I don't know or care about the physiology or psychology, but it works. I think the multiple stimulation of achieving a small task, accompanied by a satisfying or pleasurable aural sensation erodes or replaces the all-pervading lethargy and negativity. I find music by itself very mood changing, but I also find whatever you do, you have to repeat it and accept that it sometimes works quickly, sometimes takes a whole evening, and can even need repeated days to work and its longevity is unpredictable. Sometimes it sets you up for days, mere hours at others.

You are not alone and must not feel so, though the world inside your head may seem like that. Reach out to people around you as you did here. Not everyone you meet may understand or want to, but human contact still has the capacity to surprise and delight - sometimes you have to wait for a sally to come to fruition.

Good Luck and take care.

A fellow sufferer.

 

[Graham Orm]

Penny, are you on medication for the depression?

 

[Random Orbital Bob]

That was going to be my question. I would strongly recommend you visit your GP if not already done. Mental health is every bit as important as physical. If someone broke their leg they wouldn't blink about going to A&E and yet so many people suffer in silence when part of their mind has shut down or switched into "conserve battery" mode.

Sometimes the cause is circumstantial (grief etc) and other times its chemical. You sound like you have a lot on your plate and physical discomfort is a difficult cross to bear. No wonder you're feeling down.

But don't lose hope, there are so many positive steps you can take. I just think the first one should be a full and frank discussion with a medical professional. But absolutely don't forgo the fantastic advice of going into the workshop and planing up a lovely piece of teak or similar. That can be done in tandem

Reaching out to this community was a great idea, that takes courage and a certain amount of humility so congratulations on starting down the path. If it helps to continue posting here then by all means continue to do so.

 

[Mike.S]

I'm not a sufferer nor qualified to advise but thought Richard and Mike's comments were thoughtful and spot-on =D>

 

[Steve Maskery]

Hi Penny
I was never in the Services, but my cause was the aftermath of divorce. Not so much the divorce itself, that was neither here nor there, but rather the loss of my home, workshop and best-friends-next-door as collateral damage.

I did do the medication stuff, for a couple of years. It can help. But it didn't make me feel good, it just stopped me feeling bad, which is not at all the same thing. I just made me feel numb. I would not eagerly go down that road again in a hurry, TBH.

There are a few things that have kept me going. The support and long-suffering of my friends and doing whatever I felt capable of. For a few years that was just a weekly walk. I belonged to a walking club and we went out every Sunday. I'd still do it today if I hadn't done my leg in a couple of years ago, I'm too slow for a club these days.

The other thing has been my workshop build. It was a completely ridiculous project to start, way beyond my current abilities and a far higher cost than my hobby justifies. It would have been a challenge 25 years ago, when I was doing a lot more DIY and stuff and cost was not really an issue, never mind today. But when I started I was not making very good decisions, all I knew was that I wanted a workshop again. The result is that I have a shop I could only dream about before, so there are some advantages to going a bit bonkers!

I'm not suggesting that you start such a project, but maybe you could look at doing something new that you can tackle one bite at a time?

You just have to carry on carrying on.

 

[Wildman]

Well done for posting and not just disappearing into a cloud of despair. I to suffer from pain and depression though not to the extent you do. I cope by taking small steps, cleaning up maintaining tools etc for the Animal Rescue centre, they have varied needs so have a chance to make lots of bits and pieces at my own pace. Helping others has its own rewards and excellent therapy. Do what you can manage when you can.

 

[Alder]

I think you have taken an important step by speaking about it on this forum, hence some part of your mojo is not lost.
Good luck
Russell.

 

[andymf]

I've not been on the forum much lately. Nor have I been in the workshop.

See, I suffer from two major ailments. I have a badly damaged spine which leaves me in constant pain, only the degree changes. And I also suffer from a form of PTSD which often leaves me depressed, suffering anxiety attacks and Agoraphobia.

At the moment my Mojo is most definitely AWOL. I have things that I need to get on with, or things my OH wants done, but I can't work up any enthusiasm or inclination to get anything done. I just want to hide away from the world and let my brain go blank.

Does this happen to anyone else? What do they do about it?

Hi Penny,

I'm not an expert by any count but i would stay start small and don't put too much pressure on yourself. I think someone else said it but start by just going in and maybe having an organise session. Just have a tidy up and put some music on and see where you end up. Just don't put pressure on yourself. Also what inspires you/ what inspired you before? Could you maybe have a think about that and get into things that way? Hope that helps in some way.

 

[Zeddedhed]

When I got depressed (pills and booze and hoping I wouldn't wake up type depressed) one of my best mates told me to go and find someone who's life was more **** than mine and try and help them out. I did, and together with almost veterinary levels of anti depressants it worked. The two people in particular who I tried to help are now firm friends and have reciprocated many times.