How NOT to get selected for a Jury

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Myfordman

AKA 9Fingers
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I've been summoned to do jury service and I have no acceptable justification to get out of it.
I'm retired and regard it as an infringement on my free time and it will stop me woodworking!
So next line of attack is working out how to behave to minimise my chances of selection.

A "chap in the pub" said turn up in a suit and carry a notebook as the defence lawyers don't want someone who looks efficient or capable.
This might work but I told him that if it doesn't and I then get elected as Foreman of the jury, I will not be a happy bunny :lol:

So I'll throw it open to hear your tips for legitimate avoidance and please don't bother writing "Its your Civil Duty....." type comments because I'm not interested.
 
Quickly book a cheap holiday that starts the day after the summons date?

I have been summoned twice for Jury service and, at least in Scotland, selection was determined by pulling names out of a glass bowl. Both times I was lucky and didn't get picked. Quite a few did use the "I have a holiday booked" excuse and were dismissed.
 
I'm with you on this. Total infringement on your life and your right to as you please.

Say you are opposed to it in principle and therefore won't take it seriously
Say you will find everyone innocent
Say you will fall asleep
 
I felt the same way when i was called but actually ended up enjoying the time i was there. There is a good chance you won't actually end up in a courtroom as cases get postponed or settled before the case begins. Some days there wasn't a judge free. A good number of the people in the room got sent home and those of us that stayed didn't all get on a case. Most folk were sent home early for the day and asked to come back the next day etc. Some didn't come back at all. There was some kind of selection process but i can't remember what is was now, a few years down the line. It all seemed quite arbitrary, but i did eventually end up on an assault case. The court times were quite brief, with a couple of hours in the morning, then lunch, for which we were provided free tokens for the canteen. Usually a couple of hours in the afternoon, then home for the day. We got paid for our time as well. My case only lasted a few days but went on for a while in the deliberating room as we couldn't agree on the verdict and the self appointed Jury spokesman was a dick, to be honest. It ended with us not being able to achieve a majority decision and the defendant walked. The defendants solicitor also destroyed the young inexperienced solicitor for the prosecution, which didn't help their cause. Anyway, i enjoyed it in the main and would do it again gladly.

One side story to this is that my other half was a magistrate at the time and she took me to the court on the first morning and popped in with me. She was immediately whisked through the security gate and pointed in the direction of the private lift to the private restaurant, all the while being called Ma'am. I, on the other hand was stopped and searched, made to empty my pockets and pass through a detector gate. She absolutely loved it.
 
get yourself arrested by urinating on the courthouse wall :twisted:
 
I appreciate the intrusion into your free time - but if I were accused of, or a victim of, a crime, I'd like to think that the jury members were switched on and engaged 'normal' people, and not just the few (unemployed?) people who couldn't get themselves out of it.

I have a friend who's a barrister, who would love to be selected for a jury as he often says he has no idea how they come up with some of their (strange) decisions...

You could try muttering 'feck it' loudly under your breath, and claim you have Tourette's? :)
 
kdampney":2cy1akqq said:
I appreciate the intrusion into your free time - but if I were accused of, or a victim of, a crime, I'd like to think that the jury members were switched on and engaged 'normal' people, and not just the few (unemployed?) people who couldn't get themselves out of it.

The irony is that during my working career, largely on hi-tech research programmes for government departments, I wrote numerous justification letters for my team members explaining how their work was vital to the national interest and they could not be spared but I was never called myself. Now in retirement when I need one of those letters, I cannot truthfully use that route!
Had I been 6 years older, then I could get out on age grounds.
 
If the past president of the USA can turn up for jury duty, then so can the rest of us. Grit your teeth and do your little bit of service........
 
Look bewildered and keep asking "what are we doing here"

Pete
 
I can't offer tips on getting out of it, but I can tell you to take a damn good book.

I did mine at Chelmsford many years ago. Sat on my arris for a week before being selected (resulting in a 'not-guilty' for someone who was accused of nicking a pair of shoes).
 
NazNomad":2mnb2fzg said:
I can't offer tips on getting out of it, but I can tell you to take a damn good book.

I did mine at Chelmsford many years ago. Sat on my arris for a week before being selected (resulting in a 'not-guilty' for someone who was accused of nicking a pair of shoes).
Idea :idea: If the book is that good I could continue reading it during the case? Or would that be classed as contempt?

Given the recent harrassment issues in the press, maybe I should put my hand on the knee of the juror next to me??
 
phil.p":2prdjmms said:
HappyHacker":2prdjmms said:
Turn up wearing a badge saying "Bring back hanging".

And wearing a three piece suit, carrying a copy of the Mail or Telegraph. :D
And red braces with a yellow silk bow tie :)

Brian
 
Get someone to write a letter, as your carer, explaining that you have Altzheimer's, or voted brexit, or that you can't stop talking about sharpening.
 
maybe I should put my hand on the knee of the juror next to me??

Have you thought this through Bob?

He might like it. :shock:

Cheers

Dave
 
Have you replied to the letter? If not just burn it. Last time I checked they don't arrive registered post so you can claim it never arrived if they follow up. If I ever get called it's what I will do, I agree with juries in principal but if I ever got called up I cannot financially afford to do it, my work would be ruined.
 
Deejay":1zdviote said:
maybe I should put my hand on the knee of the juror next to me??

Have you thought this through Bob?

He might like it. :shock:

Cheers

Dave

Oh Yes - irrespective of gender - it could all be part of my "growing old disgracefully" philosophy! Difficult to criticise what you have not tried yet :lol:
 
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