Joke Thread 4

[quintain]

Very well put.
My sentiments exactly.

Thank you and thanks to all that have 'liked' the sentiments.
Decency hopefully will always prevail.

 

[Doug B]

 

[Andy's Shed]

 

[Doug B]

 

[ColinDeVelen]

 

[Doug B]

 

[MikeJhn]

Proof? Have you read no history? I'm a male sexist? OK, her current partner is as bad (worse?), if that evens it up.

If she was Mary from the local comp/Tesco checkout she'd have been branded a slapper long ago and no one would turn a hair.

I'm not going to argue the case any longer- I'm right.

IMO unworthy of you Phil.

 

[Jaco]

 

[dzj]

A blonde teenager, wanting to earn some extra money for the summer, decided to hire herself out as a "handy-woman"
She started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.
"Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch," he said, "How much will you charge me?"
Delighted, the girl quickly responded, "How about $50?"
The man agreed and told her that the paint brushes and everything she would need was in the garage.
The man's wife, hearing the conversation said to her husband, "Does she realize that our porch goes ALL the way around the house?"
He responded, "That's a bit cynical, isn't it?"
The wife replied, "You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe all those dumb blonde jokes we've been getting by email lately."
Later that day, the blonde teenager came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" the startled husband asked.
"Yes, she replied, and I even had paint left over, so I gave it two coats."
Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50.00 and handed it to her along with a $10.00 tip.
“And, by the way," the teenager added, "it's not a Porch, it's a Lexus."

 

[The_Yellow_Ardvark]

 

[flying haggis]

 

[Doug B]

 

[Cordy]

One for the Botanists...

Q; Who led the Israelites through the Semi Permeable Membrane ?

A; Osmosis.

 

[dizjasta]

She's little more than an upmarket slapper.

Hi Phil I think your description of Camilla is wrong. She should be described as a "Plonker" as should king Charles be described as a "Plonker". Both these people made marriage vows in "the presence of God" and after this decided the vows did not apply. It seems strange that these two people can be considered as king and queen and paragons for the UK when they are unable to fulfil vows to God.

 

[Amateur]

I do wonder if you can believe the statistics given by China, how many coal fired smelting plants do they have, I do believe they are a very large exporter of steel.

And cars to the UK.....
which if you think about it, just moves the issue from China to another country.......
A bit like Covid maybe?
They said,' Not us gov, we didn't cut up no bats'
And folk believed them?

 

[Daniel2]

 

[PhilTilson]

Hi Phil I think your description of Camilla is wrong. She should be described as a "Plonker" as should king Charles be described as a "Plonker". Both these people made marriage vows in "the presence of God" and after this decided the vows did not apply. It seems strange that these two people can be considered as king and queen and paragons for the UK when they are unable to fulfil vows to God.

Jeez! Politics AND Religion!!

 

[dzj]

 

[Jaco]

 

[TRITON]

View attachment 181323

Looks nothing like Camilla, as pictured here while out on a ride with Charles