When Insults had Class

UKworkshop.co.uk

Help Support UKworkshop.co.uk:

finneyb

Established Member
Joined
23 May 2013
Messages
1,619
Reaction score
2
Location
Merseyside
When Insults Had Class...

These glorious insults are from an era “ before” the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

A member of Parliament to Disraeli:"Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.”
"That depends, Sir, "said Disraeli,"whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."

"He had delusions of adequacy."
-Walter Kerr

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
- Winston Churchill

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."
-Clarence Darrow

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."
-William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)


"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it."
-Moses Hadas


"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
-Mark Twain


"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."
-Oscar Wilde


"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one."
-George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill


"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one."
-Winston Churchill, in response


"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."
-Stephen Bishop


"He is a self-made man and worships his creator."
-John Bright


"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
-Irvin S. Cobb


"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others."
-Samuel Johnson


"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."
- Paul Keating


"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."
-Charles, Count Talleyrand


"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."
-Forrest Tucker


"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"
-Mark Twain


"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
-Mae West


"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."
-Oscar Wilde


"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination."
-Andrew Lang (1844-1912)


"He has Van Gogh's ear for music."
-Billy Wilder


"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But I'm afraid this wasn't it."
-Groucho Marx
 

NazNomad

Established Member
Joined
30 Aug 2015
Messages
3,062
Reaction score
7
One of my favourites ...

Gv1YtWq.jpg
 

Cordy

Established Member
Joined
1 Dec 2014
Messages
1,138
Reaction score
420
Location
Wigan
Lady Astor 'If I was married to you I would put arsenic in your tea'

Winston Churchill 'If I was married to you I would drink it!'
test
dgGZgeOh.jpg
 

Tasky

Established Member
Joined
13 Jul 2017
Messages
1,067
Reaction score
2
Location
Reading, UK
Amateurs, all of 'em...
My favourite has always been: "Curs'd be the blacksmith who forged the axe, which felled the tree, from which was carved the headboard of the bed of the parents of the driver of the carriage, in which your mother and father first met...!"
:)
 

Latest posts

Top