Smacking kids

[johnelliott]

Following on from the Lord's ammendment, I'm thinking of setting up in business as a child smacker. The idea is simple, parent confused about how much force to use, calls me up, I go round and smack the kid to the degree allowed by the law. I thought maybe £10 a smack (plus £15 call out fee). Seem reasonable? Admittedly I would be doing it mostly for fun
John

 

[trevtheturner]

Doing it mostly for fun, eh? Now that sounds a bit dubious...........

Trev.

 

[frank]

what about keep still while i smack you :shock:
my wife used to trap the little b------rs in a corner with sweeping brush to smack them they are both in there thirties and say she was to soft on them

frank

 

[Dr. Thrax]

I think you'd probably get more respect from setting up a business smacking adults John, the 'Elliot House of Pain' perhaps, maybe RussianLady could give you some ideas, I believe Lords & Judges would be among your clients unwinding after a strenuous day in the courts deciding how heavy a smack should be :wink:

 

[Midnight]

just remember not to overdo the redness of the marks.... keep a colourchart handy......just in case....

<guessin it isn't just me thinkin the world's gone nutz.....

 

[Waka]

John

I know that your last statment was in jest, or I hope it was, the point I'm trying to make is that we don't know who is surfing the forum, I'd hate anyone to get that knock on the door because some cranky do gooder saw the statement.
You know how sensitive some people can be.

If you think I'm out of order then I appologise, its not my intention to upset anyone.

Waka [/quote]

 

[Dr. Thrax]

This whole issue is a tough one. Punishing children was outlawed because it was tagged as 'abuse' but there were no boundaries drawn between teaching a child right from wrong and actual physical abuse of a child. We now have a society of children who have gone into their teens without being taught right from wrong with little or no respect for authority and little or no fear of the consequences of committing a crime. Personally, and this is my personal opinion, I have zero tolerance for those pieces of human filth that abuse children, and I don't mean punishment but I do understand as a parent the difficulties in knowing what punishment to give to a child when it misbehaves. For my part I can honestly say niether I nor my wife ever had to smack our child, a stern ticking off was sufficient. As I say, a tough one with a long, troubled road ahead.

 

[ike]

As I say, a tough one with a long, troubled road ahead.

I agree with that. It used to be down to commonsense when and how parents should take what I term 'corrective action' with their children. It seems all too often not only in the context of parenting, but in many other aspects of todays' society, that there's an increasing tendency to polarize totally for or totally against something. Violence leads to violence. It's proven pyschology that children exposed to physical and verbal abuse grow into adults with problems and will exhibit tendencies towards similar behaviour. Likewise, the 100% liberal, carefree, hands off approach doesn't I believe help to reinforce social and moral responsibility - a sense of right and wrong in adults. Whatever happened to the balanced approach - good old fashioned common sense?.

Maybe I was just very lucky with my upbringing, although I do remember getting a few bum whacks from my Dad. I also seem to remember that I'd done something indisputably wrong and well, I was dumb enough to get caught!.

I probably just sound like an old fart, but then commonsense isn't fashionable any more is it?

Ike

 

[johnjin]

Hi Ike

Well if you sound like an old fart then I guess I must as well. I agree with everything that you said, and yes I can remember a few wacks on the bum from my Dad. Everyone of them well deserved and my own fault for getting caught. Its all about common sense.

Hi Doc
Yes I have zero tolerance for child abusers as well. For me they are the filth of the earth. But there is a long way between a little punishment and the sort of torture that these children went through to get the matter into parliament.

All the best

John

 

[Anonymous]

Ike and Dr

I pretty much agree.

I have two daughters one aged 10 and the other 22 (I know, we started young, it wasn't exactly planned.....) who both had a maybe 5 or 6 light smacks along the way when other approaches failed and neither has been in trouble with the police, takes drgus (ASFAIK) swears or is abusive - they both respect people and I am proud of 'em.

To legislate against sensible punishment lacks sensibility!!

Cheers

Tony

 

[Taffy Turner]

I would agree with most of what has been said above.

I think that the issue here is that it is one thing to give a child a light smack when all else fails, but the problems occur when the child is smacked in anger - that can never be right surely?

As usual it comes down to common sense - the vast majority of parents can be trusted to exercise a degree of C.S. but as usual there is a small minority out there who batter their kids senseless, and it is these idiots that the law is trying to stop, but as usually happens when these things are legislated against, it is the sensible majority who suffer, as the morons who wallop thir kids will do so irrespective of it being legal or illegal to do so.

 

[Mdotflorida]

Totally agree with Ike. There is a world of difference between a smack on the bum or hand and physical abuse of the sort that no normal parent would dream of carrying out.

I have smacked my 7 year old's hand on maybe 3 occassions in his life. He totally deserved it at the time, it was a last resort after all else failed and it sure as hell hurt me emotionally far more than it hurt him physically. But, because of it, he knows that there is a point which he cannot cross and we are proud parents when people say he's a well behaved, polite child.

What next ? Are the govt going to tell me it's against the law for me to send my son to his room. Are they going to tell me that I am infringing on his human rights if I don't let him watch 2 hours of television every day. Is it his choice whether to do his homework or not !!!

And what do they do if the softly softly approach goes wrong ? They send the parents to prison for their kids not attending school.

The one absoulety undeniable fact is that everyone is different so how can some know it all suddenly decide they know what's right for everyone.

 

[devonwoody]

But smacking is only allowed by parents?

 

[ike]

But smacking is only allowed by parents?

Err, not sure where you're coming from. Can you elaborate?

Ike

 

[dedee]

As usual it comes down to common sense

It my brief experience of bringing up children I have come to realise that there is nothing common about sense.

What is common sense to an educated, balanced and caring parent may be out of the question to an abusive, ignorant and unloving parent. I think it is common sense not to feed toddlers sugar flavoured fizzy drinks, biscuits, sweets, crisps etc. But many many parents still do not understand the behavioral changes such a diet can have.

But then these type of laws are possibly only broken by people who would not recognisee "common sense" if it hit them on the head.

Unfortunately laws are created to control the lowest common denominator in any society in our case this appears to be getting lower and lower. Due to falling education standards perhaps?


my 2 cents worth.


Andy P
PS it occurs to me that I have witnessed grown adults (men and women) break down and cry after being shouted out (verbally abused perhaps) when a physical kick or punch would probably have been brushed off.
Do you think that if the smacking bans comes in that the next step will be to stop as shouting at our children?

 

[devonwoody]

One of our daughters paid a vist recently with the grandchildren, it would appear that competative pursuits are now discouraged at many schools, example they no longer have sports days at some schools. Competative card games etc. are off the agenda with children, and smacking, which can on rare occassions be of great benefit to a unintelligent child who persists in commiting an act of transgressions, like running across a main road without looking although repeatedly being told how dangerous etc. this can be. Perhaps a good clout would help the child remember!!!!!

 

[Midnight]

Do you think that if the smacking bans comes in that the next step will be to stop as shouting at our children?

Apparently this is already an offence in Sweden... they call it psyc. abuse....

 

[Gill]

This legislation has the laudable intention of preventing parents (and all adults) from abusing children. Nobody could possibly argue against that. Unfortunately, it assumes that all parents are sufficiently adroit to be able to employ sophisticated skills that will obviate the need for physical measures. Not all parents have these skills. As a result, it could lead to a generation of miscreants who were denied the opportunity to become valuable members of society simply because the legislature denied parents the freedom to use such parenting skills as they had.

Some parents don't have the time, energy or presence of mind to use sophisticated parenting skills - that doesn't neccesarily make them bad or uncaring. Some children won't respond to anything but threatened or actual physical discipline - that doesn't neccesarily make them wicked.

I think it's wrong to deny parents the availability of a tool which might be their only parental resource in a loving family environment.

Gill

 

[johnjin]

Hi Gill
Beautifully put.

All the best

John

 

[woodshavings]

Gill,
I entirely agree with you. Although the intentions are laudable, it seems to lack the insight of experience. The situation is made worse by the "I want it now" culture that seems to have developed in both children and some parents that causes further disruptive behavior often leading to criminality , when they cant "have it now".
John