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Blister

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2 snowmen in a field

one says to the other

Can you smell carrots :p
 

Pete Maddex

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Two eggs in a frying pan,

One says "its hot in here"

The other one says "my god a talking egg"
 

Noel

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Alan Jones":3awjhgd5 said:
Had to read that twice to cotton on. Good one BB :lol:
Thrice for me. Very good.
 

Noel

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A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?"

St. Peter answered, "Those are lie-clocks. Everyone on Earth has a lie-clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move."

"Oh", said the man. "Whose clock is that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating she's never told a lie."

"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"

St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."

"Where's David Cameron's clock," asked the man?

"Cameron's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."
 

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