Daft questions

[Steve Maskery]

What daft things have you been asked recently? Today I was asked if I had a Beauty Card...

Don't you dare...

 

[gregmcateer]

When buying a bottle of wine I was rather chuffed to be asked my age by someone who didn't look old enough to be out of school, let alone selling alcohol!!

 

[No skills]

It's all relative I spose..

"Why doesn't this water heater work?" - You haven't turned it on.
"Why doesn't this door open?" - It's locked.

This and hundreds more every bloody year.

 

[MMUK]

Fitting a Georgian bar glazed window recently. Just fixed the frame in, sealed units stood against the wall beside me and the customer says "I like that glass, it's spotless and I can see through it brilliantly" :roll:

 

[gwaithcoed]

My wife said "will you post this for me". The post box is about 200 yards down the road. When I got back she said "did you post my letter?"
What the Bl***y hell did she think I had done with it ???????

Alan.

 

[IHc1vtr+]

"Are you asleep"

 

[Penny]

When someone learns that I was in the Army: "How many people have you killed?"

In New York, whilst queuing for the boat to Liberty Island I was chatting to a couple of old ladies: "Awww, you're in the English(?) Army? That's so great! Do you know Prince Harry?"

Whilst being treated for my back injury I screamed in pain as I was prodded and pulled: "Oh, did that hurt?"

 

[rafezetter]

I've probably been asked a few.... but I must confess the daftest one that sticks in my mind the most was said by yours truly. A few years ago I was babysitting Dad's yacht in Mallorca getting it ready for the season and I needed to sort out a couple of things with the marina; so I went to the office and for some reason the first words out of my mouth, completely without any help from my brain was "Hablas Espanol?" (do you speak Spanish?) Needless to say they just looked at me for a few seconds then said in a long drawn out "Ci". They then started to speak to me asking what I wanted in spanish... to which my reply was in english "sorry I don't speak Spanish".

Not my finest moment.

 

[ChrisR]

I don’t suppose it’s a daft question, but a frequent one, what’s wrong with your leg, answer there is nothing directly wrong with my leg, I have Multiple Sclerosis. But why is your leg not working, grrrrrrrrrrrrrr. :evil:

Take care.

Chris R.

 

[bugbear]

Fitting a Georgian bar glazed window recently. Just fixed the frame in, sealed units stood against the wall beside me and the customer says "I like that glass, it's spotless and I can see through it brilliantly" :roll:

In fairness, I was in a friend near-concours grade sports car, and I couldn't see the windscreen.

Which (to be explicit) was present.

BugBear

 

[CHJ]

Not recent but the one that sticks as I see the subject most days.

Hot sunny day, mid June, (you can tell it was some time ago) on my knees quickly levelling and tamping a couple of square mtrs. of concrete and dressing the edges as I go, it's a shuttered platform, part of a series of steps, and a voice behind me says, "are you busy" You guesed it, the usual family group with booklets in hand and two little children in tow.

 

[Chrispy]

Here's a stupid question, why do debt collection agency's always want payment up front?

 

[whiskywill]

I ordered a refrigerator from an on line supplier yesterday. Within minutes of placing the order I had a call from their customer services saying "You have just ordered a refrigerator from us. Can you confirm the first two lines of your address and postcode?" My reply was "Yes I can thanks."

A series of banal questions followed ending with "Why did you decide to buy a refrigerator from us? My reply? "Because you sell refrigerators."

Ask a stupid question and you'll get a stupid answer.

 

[Yorkshire Sam]

Someone handed me the phone and said "Its a long distance from Australia"
I replied " It certainly is!"

 

[Phil Pascoe]

I ordered a refrigerator from an on line supplier yesterday. Within minutes of placing the order I had a call from their customer services saying "You have just ordered a refrigerator from us. Can you confirm the first two lines of your address and postcode?" My reply was "Yes I can thanks."

A series of banal questions followed ending with "Why did you decide to buy a refrigerator from us? My reply? "Because you sell refrigerators."

Ask a stupid question and you'll get a stupid answer.

There was a headmaster quoted some while ago as saying that we did not have to worry about the intelligence of younger people. One of his teachers had asked a group of thirty children if they knew who the Prime Minister was . He got 28 yeses and two nos.

 

[Doug B]

After explaining to the customer that the silicone I had just sealed the new bath with would take 24 hours to cure & to leave it to set I left her in the bathroom & took my tools down to the van.
As I was putting the tools away said customer approached & asked if I had anymore of that sealer, yep I replied & dutifully followed her back into the house mastic gun in hand thinking she had something else to seal.
She lead me back into the bathroom I'd just left, only now there were 4 dirty big finger splodges in the new mastic.

"Can you fill those & what can I get this stuff of my fingers with?" :shock: :shock:

Ironically she was blonde


Worse one I asked as a young lad was how many thou's in one inch, boy did I get some ribbing for that

 

[MMUK]

Haha! One reason I always seal baths with clear silicone and bed in a quadrant trim!

 

[Doug B]

Haha! One reason I always seal baths with clear silicone and bed in a quadrant trim!

I'd much prefer to seal baths the way the manufacture of the silicone recommends, I've not had a problem with that over the last 30+ years & only had this one dumb customer c*ck things up so I think I'll stick with how I do it.

 

[MMUK]

Haha! One reason I always seal baths with clear silicone and bed in a quadrant trim!

I'd much prefer to seal baths the way the manufacture of the silicone recommends, I've not had a problem with that over the last 30+ years & only had this one dumb customer c*ck things up so I think I'll stick with how I do it.

That's fair enough. The main reason I bed in a trim is so that there's no visible silicone joint to go manky. Even the most expensive silicones on the market discolour and get ingrained with crud.