Another Joke

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My wife was reapplying for her driving licence and said she was donating all of her organs.i I said who's going to want your cold heart Thats when the fight started 😤 😏
Thats lucky, chance to fight, I don't think I would have seen the 2x4 coming before I hit the floor face first.....
 
Two men went out poaching rabbits, each armed with a shotgun. A hang glider flew overhead so the first man raised his shotgun and let fly.

2nd man: "hey, what was that?"

1st man: "I don't know, but I made it let go of that bloke".
 
A woman is in a jewellers admiring a large diamond ring, as she leans down for a closer look a little trump slips out, hoping no one noticed she asks “how much is that one”

The jeweller replies “madam if just looking at it caused you to fart I dread to think what you’ll do if I tell you the price”
 
Driving our kids nuts!

Yesterday my daughter e-mailed me again, asking why I didn't do something useful with my time.

"Like sitting around the pool, drinking wine isn't a good thing?” I asked.

Talking about my "doing something useful" seems to be her favorite topic of conversation.

She is "only thinking of me," she said, and suggested I go down to the Senior Center and hang out with the fellas. I did and when I got home, I decided to play a prank on her. I sent her an e-mail saying that I had joined the Senior Parachute Club.

She replied, "Are you nuts? You're 72-years-old and now you're going to start jumping out of airplanes?"

I told her that I even had a Membership Card and e-mailed a copy to her.

Immediately, she telephoned me and yelled, "Good grief, Dad, where are your glasses?! This is a membership to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club."

"Oh man, am I in trouble," I said, "I signed up for five jumps a week!"

The line went dead.


Life as a Senior Citizen isn't getting any easier, but sometimes it can be fun.
 
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