Joke Thread 4

[stuart little]

A couple, Dave and Mabel, were staying at the Grand Hotel Llandudno -- fourth floor.

Dave calls the Hotel Manager "Come up quick. we've been arguing and Mabel wants to throw herself out of the window !!"

The manager replied "Sir, this is a personal matter, I can call sec....."

Dave interrupts "No, this is a maintenance issue -- The window won't open"

I do believe them to be neighbours of mine.

 

[stuart little]

Cheese these days is more secure than the UK border View attachment 181339

It's to stop them 'meeces' nicking it, "I hate meeces to pieces"!

 

[MikeJhn]

China generates 36% of its energy from renewables. The US 22% so yes your car is the problem.

I do wonder if you can believe the statistics given by China, how many coal fired smelting plants do they have, I do believe they are a very large exporter of steel.

 

[RupertV]

She's little more than an upmarket slapper.

?

 

[MikeJhn]

Ooohh! Betty!

@stuart little she does look a little like Michele Dotrice.

 

[Phil Pascoe]

?

OK, scratch the "little more than".

 

[PhilTilson]

She's little more than an upmarket slapper.

I think that's called treason...

 

[Phil Pascoe]

I think that's called truth.

 

[llangatwgnedd]

Ron Chestna 89 years of age was stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and was asked where he was going at that time of night. Ron replied,
"I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late."
The officer asked, "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"
Ron replied, "That would be my wife."

 

[Andy's Shed]

 

[quintain]

She's little more than an upmarket slapper.

Okay
I leave myself open to criticism by keyboard warriors.
Who on this forum, especially those talking about an elderly-ish lady being a slapper would be happy to have their daughter, granddaughter or wife described online as a slapper.
I believe very few would be happy even if they in their own mind believed such to be true.
Having such inner thoughts about their loved ones, albeit regrettable is understandable; having others describing the lady as such is unforgivable.
Please do not allow, certainly not assist, this forum to sink to such gutter comments.
Richard W Mulholland

 

[dzj]